Student Journalists at Miami Beach Senior High
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Hannah Kramer
- Female
- Miami Beach, FL
- United States
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***************WELCOME****************
Profile Information
- Member Type
- Student
- Wordpress Blog
- http://hkramer14.wordpress.com
- Hometown
- PIE
- Things I read for information
- the internet, books, informational magazines
- Journalism experience (if any)
- None
- Hobbies / Interests
- Hanging out with friends and family, watching movies, playing tennis, swimming, and reading (My favorite hobby is going to Antarctica and chilling with them animals)
- Qualities I believe describe a good student
- someone who cares about their work, listen, is a good note taker, can multitask, is respectful, and uses time management
- Qualities I believe describe a good teacher
- I believe that teachers should be respectful, nice, caring, and should show things.
- Qualities I believe describe a good parent
- nice, caring, kind, not too overbaring.
- Reasons I want [my child] to study Journalism
- I didn't want to study journalism... I requested The Future Criminals of America class, but unfortunately they don't offer it here!!
HELEN DID THIS NOT ME.
- Target grade for this class (students)
- A
- Favorite authors
- Stephenie Meyer, Sarah Dessen, Judy Blume
- Favoritie musicians
- None specifically
- Favorite quote
- "And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years." Abraham Lincoln
Hey Guy's I wanted to tell you that whomever edited this profile page did it whole heartedly and meant no harm...
"I'm really sorry, about the funny comments that is, but maybe you will learn through this whole experiance to log off!!!!"
From,
Anonymous
From,
Anonymous
About
Groups
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Parents
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Editorial Meeting
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Journalism II
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Journalism I
16 members
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Graphics
2 members
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Arts & Entertainment
1 member
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Comment Wall (12 comments)
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Here's your edit. Please work on the quotes.
Here is my peer edit:
peer-editing-form-Hannah.doc
you should definetly read the comment I left you at the bottom of the link. It was well written you just need to take out all of the "you"'s and chance the lede.
Just read your "Annie" review.
It's really good, but it's missing some information.
Although your writing is superb, you say 'definitely' way too much, and over-use some adjectives very often (good/great/superb could all be considered the same adjective).
Make sure you re-check your spelling, because there are a couple of misspelled words.
Also, try to have some flow between the different paragraphs and song titles.
I feel like you should try to elaborate on the songs and story plot for someone that might not have seen the play/movie. You can't assume everyone's seen it and knows what songs/scenes you're talking about.
Good luck on your next/final draft!
Here's my edit of your opinions article
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